There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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