she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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