Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
