'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
