K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
