The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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