That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
