His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize