He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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