well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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