love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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