I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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