Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize