So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
