But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
cat food counts as protein by the way
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Randomize
