i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Randomize
