So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
areolas are like halos for boobs.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Randomize
