theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize