now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
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