you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
