party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize