Swine flu is the new snow day.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
