ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
