do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
