where am i from again
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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