He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
