I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
