I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
