Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Randomize
