at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
