If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
