Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Randomize