'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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