New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize