is your mom at the bar?
I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
