50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
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