i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
