Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Randomize
