I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
