I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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