im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
We left the knife in your bed.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
