First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
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