what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I think I sprained my soul last night
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
