If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
