You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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