He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
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I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
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Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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