Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize
