there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
