so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
