He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
