who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I've blown a few things in my day
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
