Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.